LOADING
Hello and thank you for taking the time to listen to my music.
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In 2016 I had a stroke that took out the right side of my body, everything from my nose to my toes. The doctors told me I would never be able to play the piano again and to prepare myself for a new normal. However, my OTHER doctor (God) had different plans.
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When I got home from the hospital I sat down at my keyboard. My left had could play fine but I couldn't lift my right arm up to even play and I started bawling while telling God just how disappointed and heartbroken I was.
Then I got angry. I flipped my keyboard across the room, said a few curse words and yelled out, "Their right! I'll never be able to play again!".​ That's when I heard in my heart God telling me, "Yes you will, and I will help you'.
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Within a year I was back to about 90% normal AND able to play the piano (ONCE AGAIN) as promised.
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Below are the stories behind each piece
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Janai
I fell in love with her BEFORE hello.
I wasn't going to go to a recovery meeting and this one was out of town which I hadn't been to in months. I had washed my tennis shoes which were still wet and I really didn't want to go. However, I said what the heck and put them on and went with my friends anyway.
Standing at the railing, I froze when my eyes met her. Unable to move, I just stood there and tried to look cool. You know, trying to strike a cool guy pose in case she glanced over at me. She did. She was the one who introduced herself. From there on out we both knew we were on a devine appointment. Both of us because she hadn't planned on going either.
This piece is about 2 people "trudging through the wilderness" with God in their hearts. Each living separate lives on parallel paths filled with the Father, Son and Holy Spirit. The second part is about how God all along was preparing a single path ahead of them so that they no longer had to live glorifying God alone.
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As with the Trinity, Janai & I are 3 strands in 1 (Her, Me & Jesus)
Olde Towne Stroll
There is a special charm to small towns and the one Janai and I moved to is no different (Pop. 700). It's perfect for us because we can both explore our creative natures amongst the silence of peace and calm. For her, creating Christian clay and cement art and for me, composing music.
We also both enjoy walking long distances. Our longest walk in the bigger metropolitan city we moved from was 15 miles. (Yes, just for the fun of it). We love the time together holding hands, the conversations and the continued bonding. However, this town is about 10 blocks long so we have to take our stroll on country roads.
On one late night adventure we ended up at a Pilot truck stop where we dined on chicken fingers and wings at a table watching our favorite TV show (King Of Queens) waiting for a sudden downpour to stop before heading back.
This piece represents the walk back home down the quiet country road while engaging in wonderful conversations under a now dark moonlit sky. There is a little town-square park with a gazebo that we rested at before strolling through the 2-block business district, over the railroad tracks and back to where the nights journey began. God gifted us our perfect date night.
Dance Of The Dolphin
While dolphins are not explicitly mentioned in the Bible, they are celebrated as symbols of rescue and protection, demonstrating God’s care. In Christian art, literature, and symbolism, dolphins can be linked to various spiritual concepts such as Christ, resurrection, salvation, guidance, protection, purity, innocence, harmony, and unity.
Peace In Chaos
You know how we can go along our peaceful day and all of a sudden chaos erupts? Well (when we LET Him) God will step in and restore us back to peace.
Therein lies the peace in chaos - we can find peace that He is with us through it.
Promised Comfort
After performing for a crowd waiting to go see Fidler On The Roof, a lady comes up to me and grabs my forearm.
With tears in her eyes she introduces herself: “My name is Sophia. I’m 90 years old. I recently lost my husband and I’m hurting, but your music soothed my soul and calmed my spirit. I thank God He brought you to me tonight.”
Well, I thank God He brought Sophia to me that night for many reasons. One of them is, she reminded me that sometimes God uses us because he promised someone else comfort.
This piece depicts that brief encounter and ends (much like that night) differently than when it began.
I Love My Lord
I hadn't written a piece in a few years when along came God.
One day I woke up, let my dog out, grabbed a cup of coffee, and sat down on my recliner. When my dog barked to be let in I got up from the chair and stumbled a bit. My hand hit a few piano keys that sounded pretty cool. ​So, I let her in, sat down at the piano, and came up with a piece that expresses my love and gratitude for everything He has done and is working on in my life. ​Here are the lyrics I wrote that day: ​
(INTRO)
I love my Lord, I love him so
He gives me peace throughout my day.
When things go wrong, I look toward him
so I know everything is all right.
I love my Lord, I love Him so
I go to sleep while praising Him
and when I wake, I smile real big
because I know He is right there with me.
(INTERLUDE)
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I love my Lord, I love Him so
He freed me from the grasp of me
He saved my life so I could live
and I thank Him for all of my days.
I love my Lord, I love Him so
He lived and died then rose up high
His name is Jesus Christ my Savior
and I love Him with all of my heart.
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He is my King, My everything
He is my King, My everything
He is my King, My everything
​And I love Him with all of my heart.
​Adonai
Baruch Hashem Adonai, Adonai!
Blessed be the name of Adonai.
An angel told Mary she will have a son
whom she was to name Jesus.
Baruch Hashem Adonai, Adonai!
Blessed be the name of Adonai.
The angel said He will be great and called
The most High Son of God.
Baruch Hashem Adonai, Adonai!
Blessed be the name of Adonai.
The angel also says of Jesus,
His Kingdom will never end.
Baruch Hashem Adonai, Adonai!
Blessed be the name of Adonai.
Today as I stand here before the world
I praise and worship Adonai.
Baruch Hashem Adonai, Adonai!
Blessed be the name of Adonai!
Blessed be the name of Adonai!
Blessed be the name of Adonai!
Adonai...Adonai...Adonai...
Blessed be the name of Adonai.
Forgiving Unforgivables
This song is about forgiving not only the unforgivables of others, but also our own unforgivables and even our perceived unforgivables of God. The words repeat several times because for me it's a message I need to hear over and over again:
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Forgiving unforgivables
as God forgives me for mine.
It's the only way
I can live today
from this moment on
in peace.
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Forgiving unforgivables
as God forgives me for mine.
It's the only way
I can live today
from this moment on
in peace.
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Forgiving unforgivables
as God forgives me for mine.
It's the only way
I can live today
from this moment on
in peace.
'Cuz it's the only way
I can live today
from this moment on
in peace.
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Forgiving unforgivables
as God forgives me for mine.
It's the only way
I can live today
from this moment on
in peace.
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Forgiving unforgivables.
Forgiving unforgivables.
Forgiving unforgivables.
​as God forgives me for mine.
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Forgiving unforgivables.
Good Morning God
The next best thing to waking up is waking up with a big stretch saying, "Good morning God. Lets do this!"
My Teacher
I originally didn't have a title for this piece then a friend suggested that I name it My Teacher because you can hear the repetition in places as if God is showing me what to play and me responding by duplicating it.
March To Freedom
I wrote this piece while God was in the middle of healing me from a stroke in 2016 that took out my right side, everything from my nose to my toes. At this point my shoulder and fingers were still struggling. Within a year I was back to about 90% normal.
This is the completed song. It's about letting God help us to save ourselves...FROM ourselves.
​Solitude
Solitude is positive feeling which helps us to be in a state of balance. Solitude allows us to get in touch with ourselves and reflect on our lives.​​​​
Batalla de Tacámbaro
This is a true story of a general in the Mexican army (1865) who was tasked with securing a key weapons route from Tacambaro, Mexico into Puebla, Mexico.
One day in the midst of battle his enemy rides up to him with an ultimatum, "We captured your wife and three little children. Surrender now or we execute them."
Knowing full well that if he "surrendered now" him and his family would be killed anyway, so he chose the only option he had to save their lives; fight on and WIN! Which he did. Afterwards, he went on a successful search & rescue mission to find his family.
Unbeknownst to him at the time, in the early morning hours before the battle began his wife was dragged out of prison half-naked and thrown into a trench to be used as a human shield against him.
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The general's name is Nicolas de Regules, my great great grandfather.
THE MORAL OF HIS STORY
We all have battles we fight everyday. For some it's alcoholism for others it's addiction. Whatever it is, our only hope in emerging victorious over them is to let God help us fight those battles as if our lives (and the lives of our loved ones) depend on it.
Celebracion de 1865
A grand ball was held by the president of Mexico to honor general Nicolas de Regules as a national hero. Mexico to this day celebrates him with a town named after him, statues, street names throughout Mexico, annual parades and they even gave him a special place in the Cemetery of Heroes.
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This piece depicts his wife and him dancing the first dance with the attendees joining in soon after.
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QUESTION: Who is YOUR hero? A stranger? A friend? A family member? Jesus Christ?
If Not Now...When?
If you are sitting on the fence trying to decide if you should proclaim Jesus Christ as your personal savior then ask yourself this question, "If not now...when?"
Dare To Dream
I originally wrote this for a friend of mine who, when he met the love of his life, would always tell us, "I'm going to marry her one day." Well, that one day came and I was able to play this for him and his bride at their wedding.
Although I wrote it for him, this piece really is for all of us. It's for you, it's for me, it's for anyone in earshot who has ever had a dream come true because at first, they dared to dream.
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In 2000 I dared to dream that one day I would get sober by growing closer to Christ and in 2016 I dared to dream that one day I would be able to play the piano again, all of which came true.
Machesney Park
My brother Gary and I were really close however, as life would have it, we had gone our separate ways. He moved to Machesney Park, Illinois and I went on a journey to find sobriety. After a reunion of sorts at his home, I sat down and wrote this piece that depicts my emotions from that visit. Today, we are as close as we ever were. (An example of God's power to heal).
Ode To Blue
This piece is dedicated to my dog Blue who unexpectedly passed away one night.
As we lay ready for sleep, Blue flipped my arm up unto her as if to say, "Hold me, it's my time." A few hours of sleep later I woke up and she was still laying next to me but not moving. I shook her and there was nothing. She was gone.
Once I regained composure, I went to my piano and with God's help recorded this song with tears pouring down, landing on the piano keys. It's about me remembering a collage of moments in our life together. The last four notes are HER saying to ME, "Goodbye my friend."
Christmas Memories
I wrote this a few months after my mom had passed.
When I think of Christmas
I think of you
Wrapping all your gifts of joy
in the Christmas wrapping room.
Boxes with ribbons and love in your heart,
knowing full well soon they'll be ripped apart.
Boxes with ribbons and love in your heart,
boxes so pretty they're great works of art.
When I think of Christmas
I think of you
We're sitting around the Christmas tree
singing songs out of tune.
Rudolf and Frosty,
Joy to the world,
Hark the herald angels sing
till our throats are sore.
Rudolf and Frosty,
Joy to the world,
Hark the herald angels sing
and many many more.​
When I think of Christmas
I miss you, mom.
It's not about the gifts you gave,
it's about your endless love.​
Boxes with ribbons
songs that we sang,
traditions you shared
are now held very dear.
Boxes with ribbons
songs that we sang,
yes you're in Heaven,
but oh so very near.
(The First Noel)
*Big sigh* "Love you mama!"
Daddy's Lullaby
I wrote and sang this for my boys many years ago because the other lullaby where the wind blows and the baby comes tumbling down I thought might scare the bejeebies out of them. Here are the simple lyrics.
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I lay you in your little bed,
and tuck you in good night.
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I kiss the top of your forehead,
now you close those eyes real tight.
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Cuz it's time to go to sleep,
with your face all aglow.
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Don't you worry baby,
I'll see you tomorrow.
Hmmm, the more I think about it, I wonder if God sings this to me as well?
God's Beckoning Light
There was a time I once saw an illusive light of soberness in front of me. I no sooner would walk toward it that it would move forward, seemingly impossible to catch up to in order to stand inside it's brightness.
Only through a power greater than myself (God), some friends said, would that shining light stand still. They told me, "One step forward. Now another and another..."
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I took those steps of faith and to my surprise, the beckoning light stayed still.
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Once both feet were firmly planted inside I glanced back, as I often do without morbid reflection, to see the darkness of a life once lived.
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By that same power greater than myself, I now see the path forward today knowing that the darkness behind me is taunting, "One step backwards. Now another and another..."
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But not today, for my feet are firmly planted in the warmth of a sober life lit by God's Beckoning Light.
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SOBER DATE: 11/28/2000​​​​
REVIVED!
I wrote this for Janai when she was going through a difficult time. Upon getting some bad news she (I believe through the Holy Spirit) was reminded that God will use it to her advantage and was instantly revived.​​​​​​​​​​​
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